“Seasons of Life”

19 12, 2018

It’s OK to be Sad at Christmas

By | 2018-12-18T22:05:51-08:00 December 19th, 2018|Grief and Healing, Seasons of Life|4 Comments

If you are sad this Christmas, it is ok. We tend to feel that the holidays aren't a time for sadness. That we should magically "feel better" or at least pretend to be doing fine. And while around some people it may be easier or best to pretend, it is important that with ourselves and our trusted friends, we be honest. Share your sorrow with someone who also shares it. If a friend or family member has died this year, others are also missing them. Reach out, be a connection and remind them - affirm for yourself - no one [...]

31 08, 2017

The Compounded Grief of Premature Deaths

By | 2017-08-31T06:43:25-08:00 August 31st, 2017|Child Loss, News, Perspective, Seasons of Life|0 Comments

There are no easy deaths - there are no situations where the grief experience isn't difficult, complex, and sad. That said, there is a generally accepted threshold where lives are deemed as having been "lived, good and long." When 90 year olds die, we grieve but we do not grapple with a sense of injustice. But there are some (too many) deaths that are non-sensical, tragic, and far too soon. I think of the anniversary of 9/11 and the tradition of reading of the names of those that died - it gives me chills every time and is a witness [...]

12 02, 2017

Transforming Painful Days into New Traditions

By | 2017-02-12T20:06:35-08:00 February 12th, 2017|Inspiration, Perspective, Seasons of Life|0 Comments

A Table for 1 on Valentine's Day Holidays/birthdays/anniversaries ... there is always one of these days looming around the corner it seems when we are in the throws of grief. Days that used to hold so much joy and fun and now hold anxiety, dread and loss. How do we cope with these painful days that hold traditions and decades of memories? What do we do on Valentine's Day when our Valentine has died? I want to talk about how we can be intentional about transitioning parts of these days into new traditions. As I thought about what to write for Valentine's Day, another tough [...]

14 09, 2016

Say “Died”: Don’t Lie to Kids About Death

By | 2016-09-14T06:00:47-08:00 September 14th, 2016|Community, News, Resources & Information, Seasons of Life|0 Comments

    Talking to kids about grief is a classic example of ways adults over-complicate, over-think, and over-explain the ideas of death and what it's like to miss someone. Talking about death is uncomfortable for a lot of people, mostly because death is something no one wants to think about. Because we would rather avoid the topic than spend time thinking about it, our kids' understandings of death suffer. From what I have heard and even observed some funeral professionals say about death to their own children is proof that it's not easy for anyone to tell a sweet child about [...]

17 08, 2016

“But, it’s been 10 years …” Grieving a Long Ago Loss

By | 2016-08-17T07:00:05-08:00 August 17th, 2016|Ceremonies, News, Perspective, Seasons of Life|0 Comments

 || This month I am sharing a unique experience I had at a grief workshop where a 10 year old loss came flooding back to me in a deeply profound and changing way. I'm excited to share it with you! But, it's been 10 years ... As I've shared in my previous posts, I attended the Association for Death Education and Counseling Conference earlier this year. I've always left these conferences with pages on pages of notes and ideas to bring back to you and when I saw a session focusing on remembering, I knew I needed to go ... not for [...]

24 03, 2016

Death Died a Long Time Ago

By | 2016-03-24T12:00:36-08:00 March 24th, 2016|Inspiration, News, Seasons of Life|3 Comments

As Easter approaches and Spring continues to bloom all over our beautiful county, my heart and eyes behold the hope of this season; the hope of life. A favorite song of mine growing up had the line "Death died a long time ago" - it's meaning is rooted in the Christian faith but I think the words ring true for all of us who have hope beyond this world of seeing our loved ones again. From the song's perspective, death is a temporary divide. In the Easter story, the true grim finality of death is erased when Jesus is raised from the dead. With [...]

2 12, 2015

Grief During the Holidays: 5 Ways for Adults and Children to Remember

By | 2015-12-02T07:47:29-08:00 December 2nd, 2015|Inspiration, News, Seasons of Life|3 Comments

Each year as we prepare for and pass by our Candlelight Service of Remembrance I am confronted with the multitudes of losses experienced in our community in just 1 year. I think of these families and wonder how their holidays are going. I'm sure they didn't expect to be in grief during the holidays this year, nor do they yet know how that grief can change everything. Yes, Halloween & Thanksgiving have been survived so there may be some sense of, "I can do this" even though they may not want to. But, now Christmas is coming ... But Christmas is on [...]

25 06, 2015

After They Die: Sorting Through Their “Stuff”

By | 2015-06-25T00:00:30-08:00 June 25th, 2015|News, Seasons of Life, Self-Help|3 Comments

  Getting rid of someone’s stuff after they die is tough. It is an admission. For some people, it is the ultimate act of reconciling the permanence of a loss. A lot of “stuff” – baseball cards, the shirt from the family portrait, a picture they painted or a lucky sock – it all gets left behind when someone dies. For many people the thought of “getting rid” of these items they touched, wore and loved is nauseating, inconceivable. When there is a loss of life there is a creation of meaning that soaks into places, symbols, objects; and immediately [...]

17 12, 2014

Handling the Holidays: Adjusting to the Loss

By | 2014-12-17T23:15:22-08:00 December 17th, 2014|Inspiration, Seasons of Life, Self-Help|7 Comments

  For some of you, this is not the first holiday where you will be missing people you love. You "survived" the holidays last year but maybe just barely. Perhaps you feel like you can't get in the spirit of Christmas, you feel like a desolate place and everyone around you is putting on bows and smiling. Yes, you've made it through one round of the holidays but that doesn't mean this will be easy. In some ways, the second year of grief can be more difficult as the permanence of the loss begins to really sink in. For others, [...]

9 07, 2014

Grandma and “My Girl” – How A 2 Year Old Broke Through to A 100 Year Old Heart

By | 2014-07-09T15:03:26-08:00 July 9th, 2014|Inspiration, Seasons of Life|34 Comments

I started babysitting my friend’s daughter, Malia, when she was three months old. The first time was as a favor because her parents could not find a sitter for the day. The next time was just for fun since I love babies and soon I found that I loved having Malia around. We now have the tradition of spending every other Tuesday together. Five months ago I introduced her to my Grandma. I hesitated to make the introduction because in previous years my Grandma had been very jealous of my attention and was never excited to know that she would [...]