“Inspiration”

23 01, 2019

Gently “Tidying Up” After a Death: Using the KonMari Method

By | 2019-01-24T09:31:29+00:00 January 23rd, 2019|Grief and Healing, Inspiration, Self-Help|0 Comments

Perhaps you've seen the new show on Netflix, Tidying Up or you've heard of Marie Kondo and her philosophy of how to go through your home deciding what to keep and what to let go. In her "KonMari Method" she speaks about honing our sense of what brings us joy. So the idea is we hold an item in our hands and if it brings joy, keep it. If it doesn't, we thank it for what it gave to us, and we let it go. This isn't an easy task to take on. Perhaps some areas of your home or life [...]

24 10, 2018

Making New Memories from the Old (Up-cycling & Great Gift Ideas!)

By | 2018-10-24T23:10:42+00:00 October 24th, 2018|General, Grief and Healing, Inspiration|1 Comment

One of the often unaddressed issues families face after a loved one dies, is what to keep and how to keep it? Often times we feel inclined to keep a LOT - sure we can donate some things or divvy them up amongst family - but the need to preserve and hold on is a part or phase of grieving for many people. Over time, as we begin to identify the items that hold the most meaning for us we can begin to alleviate ourselves of the less significant items. Eventually, these can be given away or donated without pain. [...]

14 06, 2018

Missing Your Dad on Father’s Day

By | 2018-06-13T23:38:45+00:00 June 14th, 2018|Grief and Healing, Inspiration, Parental Loss|0 Comments

Living intentionally with people is paramount to living well. I also believe intentionality is essential to grieving well. Father's Day hits a tender spot. Every year as I write posts about mothers and fathers I'm struck by the feeling of each day. Mother's Day feels pink and rosy, the prime of spring, and there's a fresh sweetness to it that just fits with the idea of celebrating our moms. Father's Day is at the cusp of glorious, adventure-filled summer and there's a nostalgia that comes with that of our days playing in the yard, family vacations and ice cold drinks. [...]

16 11, 2017

Talking with the Dead

By | 2018-01-31T09:16:33+00:00 November 16th, 2017|Community, Inspiration, News|0 Comments

I have learned so much from grieving people and I continue to be amazed at the creative, meaningful, and symbolic rituals they take on in the journey of missing their loved one. Recently, I came across a story deeply grabbed my heart and that I am so thankful I listened to. From the podcast, This American Life, I listened to Episode #597, "One Last Thing Before I Go." To paraphrase the story for you, in Japan a man's cousin died. Desiring an outlet for his grief, he found an old phone booth and installed it in his yard. The phone was old, [...]

23 07, 2017

My Favorite Advice About Time

By | 2017-07-23T23:13:13+00:00 July 23rd, 2017|Inspiration, News, Perspective|0 Comments

I recently finished a podcast called S-Town that featured the true & tragic story John B. McLemore, an astoundingly brilliant horologist - that is, someone who has studied time. The narrator and John begin to discuss sundials together and I learned that most sundials feature a latin inscription about time. Some of them stole my breath, Hora fugit, ne tardes. The hour flees, don't be late. Festina lente. Make haste, but slowly. Lente hora, celeriter anni. An hour passes slowly, but the years go by quickly. Sic vita fluit, dum stare videtur. Life flows away as it seems to stay the same. Ultima latet [...]

27 04, 2017

Stop Saying, “This happened for a reason.” A De-Bunking of Christian Narratives on Death

By | 2017-04-27T00:14:41+00:00 April 27th, 2017|Inspiration, News, Perspective|0 Comments

Ok, so I am going to get slightly religious in this post - it's a necessity in this case and it's no big deal. I try to remain neutral in my writing but I feel this topic calls for a bit of background and religious context. Here goes ... I am fluent in "Christian-ese". After 25 years of growing up in a church with an evangelical background I can tell you with fair confidence that Christians are like everyone else when it comes to control - they need it. One of the crazier things I hear said about death (particularly the deaths that make [...]

12 02, 2017

Transforming Painful Days into New Traditions

By | 2017-02-12T20:06:35+00:00 February 12th, 2017|Inspiration, Perspective, Seasons of Life|0 Comments

A Table for 1 on Valentine's Day Holidays/birthdays/anniversaries ... there is always one of these days looming around the corner it seems when we are in the throws of grief. Days that used to hold so much joy and fun and now hold anxiety, dread and loss. How do we cope with these painful days that hold traditions and decades of memories? What do we do on Valentine's Day when our Valentine has died? I want to talk about how we can be intentional about transitioning parts of these days into new traditions. As I thought about what to write for Valentine's Day, another tough [...]

24 03, 2016

Death Died a Long Time Ago

By | 2016-03-24T12:00:36+00:00 March 24th, 2016|Inspiration, News, Seasons of Life|3 Comments

As Easter approaches and Spring continues to bloom all over our beautiful county, my heart and eyes behold the hope of this season; the hope of life. A favorite song of mine growing up had the line "Death died a long time ago" - it's meaning is rooted in the Christian faith but I think the words ring true for all of us who have hope beyond this world of seeing our loved ones again. From the song's perspective, death is a temporary divide. In the Easter story, the true grim finality of death is erased when Jesus is raised from the dead. With [...]

2 12, 2015

Grief During the Holidays: 5 Ways for Adults and Children to Remember

By | 2015-12-02T07:47:29+00:00 December 2nd, 2015|Inspiration, News, Seasons of Life|3 Comments

Each year as we prepare for and pass by our Candlelight Service of Remembrance I am confronted with the multitudes of losses experienced in our community in just 1 year. I think of these families and wonder how their holidays are going. I'm sure they didn't expect to be in grief during the holidays this year, nor do they yet know how that grief can change everything. Yes, Halloween & Thanksgiving have been survived so there may be some sense of, "I can do this" even though they may not want to. But, now Christmas is coming ... But Christmas is on [...]

21 10, 2015

A Crash Course in Listening: 3 Do’s and Don’ts

By | 2015-10-21T22:42:25+00:00 October 21st, 2015|Community, Inspiration, News, Self-Help|1 Comment

  One of the biggest concerns people have when they encounter a bereaved individual isn't (strangely enough) how the bereaved person is doing, but "what do I say to them?" The secret to "what to say" is simple in theory, but ironic in reality because honestly, "saying something" isn't the key. We feel a lot of pressure to say something but the best thing you can do is to listen with compassion. When you feel the pressure to open your mouth, start with a simple but sincere question, "How are you holding up?" and then ... listen. Listening is THE KEY when it comes to talking to someone who [...]