Grieving Your Sweetheart
Valentine's Day without your Valentine is not going to be an easy day. There's a darkness just to saying or typing out the idea. If this Sunday will be your first or fifteenth Valentine's Day without your sweetheart, I am truly so sorry. Since you are here, I'm [...]
The Importance of Endings
We need things to end. Most of the time, we dread or avoid endings. They are sad, difficult, unwanted and force us to face a changed reality. But I believe that we need endings, desperately. I have never craved an ending for a year as strongly as I have [...]
What Do You Give a Grieving Person?
Grieving people can be difficult to buy for. The main reason for that, is that their life has taken on a complete and total inventory check of what's meaningful and actually important. I remember hearing a bereaved person say that their "bullsh!t meter" was sharper than ever [...]
How Can I Be Thankful for Pain?
Thanksgiving hits some sharp notes for so many of us this year. What are we supposed to be thankful for in a year of tumult, solitude, restriction and change? If you are reading this - it is most likely because someone you dearly love has died. HOW does one [...]
Sad Holidays 101: Creating Boundaries for Yourself and Your Grief
The holidays are always stressful. Always. But, that stress generally pays off with special gatherings, joyful present giving and tasty food. But when you are grieving all of this can just seem grey and tasteless. There isn't a payoff for the anxiety and in fact, there might be a [...]
Why You Should Cry Today: Rui-katsu & the Tear Teacher
This week my husband sent me a short video produced by the BBC entitled, "The man teaching Japan to cry." I had goosebumps just a few seconds in and was deeply moved by the sweetness of the "tear teacher," Hidefumi Yoshida. He claims to have brought over 50,000 people [...]
Learning to Live with the Unimaginable
Learning to live with the unimaginable ... this is what grief is. And this is what our collective life is right now. The lyric, "learn to live with the unimaginable" comes from one of my favorite Hamilton songs. When I watched it last month for the first time, this [...]
The Gravity of Grief, and a Way Through
Stick with me on this one - I think it's important. When COVID lockdowns started, I found myself very isolated at home with two very little children. TV became a primary escape for us as parks, beaches and even grandparents were off limits. When Disney released Frozen 2 early, [...]
They Are Dying, and You Can’t Be There
They are dying and you can't be there. People have died alone before. This isn't new. Unexpected deaths, delays, avoidance, or hope of healing are just some reasons that can keep us from being at a death bed when a death occurs. But never or rarely are people prevented [...]
The Worst Time to Die: COVID-19 & the Resources We Need
Babies are still being born. People are still dying of other, "regular" causes and "regular" tragedies. Lives are being changed by a cancer diagnosis and others are being cured. Life is moving ahead despite how on-hold it all feels. And while there is NEVER, ever, ever, ever a "good" [...]